Mr. Good Enough

I work from home, and when you work from home (or at least when I work from home) I find myself watching a lot of crap in the day. Mr. Phil has become one of those shows. And today's show is very interesting. It's talking about the modern woman. The definition of the modern woman is the woman who is making her own money, has an education, and can be the bacon bringer in the relationship. Before the break, Dr. Phil asked, 'should women stop searching for Mr. Right, and settle for Mr. Good enough'?

Fuck no.

I am this modern woman he speaks of. I have worked very hard for my career, and I make a good living (I have big bills as well but that's another story for another time). I've never regretted the time I've put towards my career. But I have found that my having brains and speaking my mind is a detriment to dating. At least in the nation's capital (which, btw, I find incredibly ironic). When men approach me (if they have the balls to do so), they come at me with some bullshit that has worked on other women and can't figure out why it doesn't work with me. And instead of sticking around to figure out why, they choose to find the one who is less work (i.e. will give it up without making them work for it). I'm not intimidating, let's get that out of the way right now. I don't have an overbearing presence, I am not a know-it-all, and have never been a bully. But what I do have is an incredible radar for bullshit and very low tolerance for it. And I'm sorry, I'm not settling.

Why can't I find a man who appreciates a strong woman who still knows how to be feminine? One woman on the show said, only the weak are intimidated, me and my husband, blah, blah. Operative word here? Husband. I'm not sure if there ARE any men who aren't intimidated by women like me. And yeah, education is important to me, and you making a living for yourself is important because A) im not paying your way and B) I don't want to deal with your ego bullshit if you are put off by the fact that my pay is more than you. But there are so many things that are attractive to me, and I am almost always willing to give a guy a chance if he asks for one. I have a type I gravitate to, but I've dated men who haven't fit into that category because they have other traits that bump their attractive factor up.

I know so many incredible women who are smart, funny, beautiful, ambitious and feminine- myself included. And yet, many are single and have dealt with their fair share of bullshit- myself included. Men need to step up and be a man and believe me, we'll be ok with being the woman.